💌 Love Letters | Issue 12: You Are a Part of the Equation Too

Hi Sweet Soul,

One of the most powerful truths I share with my clients is this: You are a part of the equation too.

It sounds simple, but for women, it can feel revolutionary. We’ve been taught, overtly and subtly, that our needs, our voices, and our presence are optional. From a young age, we see images of women speaking and being interrupted, reduced, or criticized—overpowered in meetings, labeled “bossy” or “too much,” shamed for being assertive. Name-calling, sarcasm, microaggressions, and subtle diminishment teach our nervous systems that showing up fully is risky. No wonder we hesitate. No wonder we shrink. No wonder speaking our truth feels unsafe.

Here’s something vital: even if you speak up and mess up your words, your nervous system just got new information. Every time you honor yourself—saying no, expressing your feelings, asserting a boundary—you are teaching your body and brain that your presence matters. You are rewiring patterns that told you your needs are optional and reclaiming your voice from a culture that trained you to silence it.

Permission isn’t about waiting for approval. It’s about acknowledging: I see me. I hear me. I matter. Every act of self-validation—big or small—strengthens your nervous system’s ability to respond from safety, clarity, and agency rather than fear or guilt. You are not just part of the conversation—you are a vital part of the equation.

✨ This week’s practice: Claim Your Voice

1. Find Your Ground:
   Sit or stand with your feet planted firmly on the floor. Take three slow breaths, feeling the support beneath you. This is your foundation—you are rooted and present.

2. Visualize the Cultural Messages:
   Close your eyes and bring to mind the images, experiences, and words that trained you not to speak up—interruptions, name-calling, being diminished or dismissed. Notice where in your body you feel tension, tightness, or fear. Don’t push it away—just feel it.

3. Step Into Your Permission:
   Now, imagine yourself speaking your truth anyway. You might stumble over words, your voice might shake—and that’s okay. Even if you “mess up,” your nervous system is learning new information. Feel the courage in the act itself, not perfection.

4. Feel the Shift:
   Notice your chest, your throat, your hands—wherever you carry your presence. Imagine those areas filling with warmth and space, your body saying: I matter. I am part of the equation too.

5. Anchor It With Breath:
   Take three more slow breaths. On each exhale, let your body absorb the permission you just practiced. Every time you honor your voice, your nervous system rewires itself to respond from agency rather than fear.

🖊️ Journaling Prompts:

• Where have I minimized myself because of cultural messages about women speaking?

• How does my nervous system respond when I claim my needs or assert my voice?

• What does it feel like to validate myself first, even if others resist or misunderstand?

• How would my relationships, work, or environment shift if I fully counted myself in the equation?

This is a love letter to you, learning that self-love and self-expression are not indulgent—they are essential. You are remembering that your voice, presence, and boundaries matter. You are beginning to feel that when you validate yourself first and step into your power, the world reflects back a love and respect you have already cultivated within.

💜 Em

P.S. If this letter resonated, I’d love to hear what it stirred in you.

And if you’re ready to take this work deeper, my self-paced course Who You Are Meant to Be walks you through reclaiming your essence, rewiring old patterns, and choosing yourself again and again.

Learn more here ➡️ EmilyBrownConsulting.com

Photo by Priscilla Du Preez 🇨🇦 on Unsplash